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‘ TV News-channel music idents ’ ( File under – Editor’s rant )

It’s wonderful for the composers. They may have been paid peanuts for the original composition, but they get a royalty every time it’s played.

Some TV news channels ( you know who you are ) play the same piece of ‘station ident’ music dozens of times each hour - 24 hours a day. And sometimes the same track is used for years – yes, years ( you know who you are ), on end.

To do so is sorely mistaken.

It ignores basic human psychology in favour of [ deleted deleted ] ‘branding’ concepts from the marketing suits.

Here’s the deal. You walk to the office every day and see the same average-looking guy hanging around in the same place. You go out to lunch and he’s still there. On your way home he’s there again. And every day’s the same. He’s always there. Groundhog Day style. Although you might find it odd, after a few weeks you completely ignore him. He might as well be invisible.

But, if that same guy shouted “ Hi ! My name’s Bertie Basil Cuthbertson ! “ in your ear every single time that you passed him – then after a few days you would ( quite understandably ) want to strangle him . . .

It’s that simple.

A ‘visual’ logo is not annoying - however many times you see it. It might be dull, but ( unless you’re an over-precious graphic artist ) it won’t annoy you. An ‘audio’ logo is an entirely different beast. Endlessly repeated phrases ( spoken or musical ) pretty soon irritate the bejeeezzus out of anyone unfortunate enough as to be in range.

So, Bertie Basil Cuthbertson, ENOUGH ALREADY ! Purleese !

* * *

If any TV execs read this, and want to get a handle on how it feels at the user end, here's our newly-commissioned Really Magazine music ident ( ©omposer:Martin g )

( press a few times for the full effect )

p.s. In case any readers might be under the impression that such ident tracks are highly expensive to produce – they’re not. There isn’t one on air ( that we’ve come across ) that would take longer than a day to produce in a basic home studio. Nowadays, ‘production music’ tracks are pretty cheap to record. Broadcasters spend more on disposable plastic cups in the canteen.

The royalty payments, do, however, rapidly add up. But, even if they ‘ changed their tune ‘ every week, the TV station would pay out exactly the same fees to the royalty collection agencies . . .

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